Matilda’s whole life forks between success and obscurity! It’s the most important night of her life. Nicholas juggles a house full of people and Penny on screen from her hospital bed in Australia.
The episode opens with Nicholas on the phone with his mother Penny, who has just had an operation and is in the hospital. He’s hurt she didn’t tell him about the surgery ahead of time, and she says she didn’t tell him because he’s in the U.S. and couldn’t do anything. He’s sorting through a box of electronics and manages to connect his mother to the TV so they can video chat. In his mother’s over-dramatic fashion, she insists Matilda and Genevieve don’t need to witness “the end times”. Nicholas quips “it’s either nothing or it’s stage 4 cancer. You’d behave the same either way.” It seems Penny is jealous that Nicholas is with his siblings instead of her.
Nicholas notes that someone brought her flowers, and she says they’re from Malcolm, an “ex-boyfriend” who is under the impression they’re still dating. Nicholas is saved from this awkward conversation as the girls and their friends arrive home. Drea brings her service dog Luke, who Nicholas takes an immediate liking to.
In the living room, Tellulah and Barb see Penny on the screen. Penny proceeds to insult poor Barb while questioning the need for Drea’s service dog. Matilda requests quiet. She is stressed because of a secret only Drea knows, and Penny once again pipes up to tell her that no one cares. She says the girls are lucky to have Nicholas with them, which makes the situation more awkward.
Nicholas sits down and realizes one of his beetles, Sapphire, is lost. In the midst of the chaos as they search for the beetle, Alex arrives. Nicholas literally forces Alex into a closet to discuss the situation. Alex says he wants to talk about what happened in Mexico, but in typical Nicholas fashion he deflects, telling Alex he’s about to meet his mom. In the living room, Drea is reading Barb’s palm and tells her she won’t have any children as Nicholas rushes back in with Alex. He shoves Alex in front of the camera so his mom can see him.
Penny says she’s fascinated by the fact that one of them is rich and tall while the other is short and young. Tellulah, watching it all from the couch, says she’s “not leaving here ever” when Genevieve attempts to get them to leave. Alex, defending himself, says that he has a bigger penis, which gets a laugh out of Penny.
Nicholas gets a call from Linda, Barb’s mother. She’s frantic because she doesn’t know where Barb is. They had a big fight and Barb left. As they talk, Nicholas watches through a window as Barb and Tellulah have a slapping contest. Nicholas covers for Barb, telling Linda that he hasn’t seen her but that the girls haven’t come home yet so she might be with them. Linda seems relieved to hear this.
Nicholas comes back inside and admonishes everyone for not looking for Sapphire. He pulls Barb aside and tells her he doesn’t want to know what happened, but that she needs to call her mother. Matilda continues to frantically refresh the computer and waves her fingers at it as if to conjure what she’s looking for. She finally admits to Nicholas that she’s waiting to hear from Julliard and will know by midnight if she got in. Nicholas is excited, but then Genevieve asks to speak to him alone.
Genevieve thinks Matilda won’t get into Julliard and is worried that Matilda will have a meltdown in front of all the guests when she is rejected. She suggests that when the time comes, she will distract all the girls so they won’t see. Nicholas notes that she could be wrong and Matilda could beat the odds and eventually give a TED Talk about this moment, but Genevieve just rolls her eyes as she leaves.
Later that night, Matilda is still sitting in front of the computer as Alex and Penny chat. They seem to be getting along well as Penny discloses that Nicholas had to have hair transplants as a child and Alex laughs. In Genevieve’s room, the girls are playing with praying mantises as Barb discusses what happened with her mom. Barb stole a “teddy” from a department store to get revenge on her mother’s behalf after a clerk said something rude to her. Linda wasn’t amused and wants Barb to return it. Tellulah chimes in, saying that it’s ridiculous to believe that this was some sort of vigilante justice and that Barb stole it for herself. Genevieve asks what a teddy is, and Tellulah tells her it’s sexy lingerie. Tellulah ruefully says that Linda “needs a lover … or a horse” to which a horrified Barb replies, “she has my dad!” Tellulah, ever a font of horrible ideas, says they need to give Linda a real problem and catfish her. Then, Linda will be too distracted by her new lover to bother Barb. Barb is disgusted and Genevieve is stunned.